Things That Matter

Love in the time of web

We share a cab ride with a stranger and when the guy strikes a conversation, we call him a creep and sometimes even clutch the pepper spray in our bags sure enough to use it if the guy so much as budges from his seat. However, after reaching home, we log on to that dating app we love so much and make small talks with another stranger who is typing at the other end. The screens between us makes all the difference. And so, we don’t need a pepper spray now. Not yet anyway.

More and more people are turning to online dating apps to find love. While, a lot of us are only looking for a companion on a boring weekend when all our friends have other plans. Some of us actually find love! 

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And then, we bore each other with snapshots of some good looking food. During the meal however, we tap tap tap away the time with eyes stuck on our cell phones chatting with another.

We come across so many people at work, at events, social gatherings, but we don’t make an effort to talk even when we want to because well, who does that? We like them, we admire their pictures on social media but we don’t tell them. We fear being called ‘weird’, ‘clingy’, ‘too friendly’ or something worse. There are so many people we are connected with on social media who like our pictures regularly and maybe even slide a comment or two, but when we see them in real life (IRL as people call it) we look the other way. Not weird at all…!!

internet-vs-real-life-talking

After a breakup we are still Facebook comrades and all their information is laid down in front of us. We know where they are vacationing and with who and also what they’re eating! The not-so-long lost love has found a home in our twitter feed. We don’t miss seeing them… Social media doesn’t let us.. we see them virtually everyday! Where is the longing?

During their courtship, my parents wrote letters – long heartfelt handwritten letters to each other. They’d wait for the mail eagerly and patiently, 2-3 letters a month. And sometimes, the letters went missing in transit as well. Today, when a text isn’t responded to, we call each other and start an interrogation.

After 15 years of marriage, Mom was away for a year in another town for work and she’d call us several times everyday to tell us how much she missed us. One night however, she longed for Home a little more than usual and called my father, told him she missed him and started to cry. The next morning, my father drove 12 hours straight to meet her for a few. He did not ‘check-in’ on social media to show off his road trip! Nor did mom write a thank you post tagging him and announcing “relationship goals” to all her friends. The moment was for the two of them and they lived it.

We as a generation are too far into the ‘social network’ but it’s the old fashioned love I crave and sometimes, I wish I was born in another era when there was no technology to track the electronic footprints of our lives…

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20 thoughts on “Love in the time of web

  1. I was touched by your parents story. I had a similar surprise once that meant everything to me, but then I come from a generation that preceded social media, and our instincts are still to the personal touch. If you find someone who thinks that way about you, never let them go.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. You are welcome Himadri 😊. Your blog is really awesome and inspiring. You have a great gift within you.Please continue blogging and inspire people around you 😊. And if you can please do visit my blog and let me know about it. It would be really helpful 😊. This is the link to my blog

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        Like

    1. Hey It’s an amazing blog & even I do feel we are just a screen apart from everyone we know but we aren’t actually connected to each other like the people of previous generations.

      The idea of sending Love letters & waiting for the response sounds so romantic. I am not as good as you are at writing, so not sure how well I would do at dating if I was born in that Era; Not that I am doing any better in this era lol

      And by giving ‘heart’ to you, in the silly comment I left above I was reffering to all those love reactions on Facebook or all the Instagram likes we leave behind in our elecronic footprints but share comparatively so less lovely moments with our families or friends or significant other.

      Like

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